Anna.

Things are looking up, oh finally!

Just as an update, things are getting better. Anna is sleeping much better, there's less of a fight and it's safe to say she's sleeping through the night. And I'm actively looking for a job, which is good for so many reasons. It's better for us financially, better because I'll get some more time to myself, and the time I do have with Anna will be quality. And I've settled on some form of direction of my life, and I've re-enrolled in uni starting back next year.

The only real struggles we're facing at the moment is Anna starting on solids. She is so stubborn. Oh my gosh. I've resorted to starving her of a bottle to get her to eat solids. She'd prefer to starve. And I give in. I'm not going to let her be silly enough to go without food for more than 5 hours, which is what she proved to me today.

And of course we've still got our financial stresses, that's a given. But if I get a job we'll be pretty set. The down side, I've got to have my thyroid out, so it might postpone the job search for a bit until that's sorted, and being on the public hospital wait list, it could be a while.

But none the less, things really are looking up. Anna and I are having some lovely times together. After my trip to Adelaide (which I will blog on the weekend) I've come back with some changed perspectives (as I usually do when I return from there) and I'm just slowing down, enjoying my little girl, and just stop rushing absolutely everything. I'm much more relaxed, I'm optimistic, I'm excited. And more and more I'm actually feeling like a mum. Because I've slowed down, I'm finding I'm really loving who I am and my time with Anna. For instance, Anna and I spend about an hour just being before bed time. I'll tickle the back of her neck, lightly rock her, give her little fairy kisses, like my mum always did when I was growing up. She still does that now. Doing things that my mother did really makes me feel like a mum. No one loves me more than my mum and dad, and I love no one more than my daughter. I hope Anna will love no one more than her own kids too.

I think I'm reaching that stage where you stop fighting being a parent, and embrace it. I'm a better mum for it.

But to get to what everyone really comes on the blog for, here's some photos of Anna. She's more beautiful as every day goes by.

I love you more today than yesterday, but not as much as tomorrow.

My gorgeous girl. Gives me a reason to get out of bed every day.

Just woke up. I love that 'well slept' look.

This was a very difficult photo to get. Anna is very against anything precise and tedious; try cutting her nails!
I wanted to take it because her eye colour is just gorgeous.

Oh and this is Anna demonstrating how difficult it is to get a good shot of her.

Like sunshine.


Now, this is Anna at approximately midnight a couple of weeks ago. This was a regular find.

...And this is her now, at around 7:30pm.

10 months old. Where did that go?? You were only just born....

Leaving it to the Pro's.

We just got the shots back from Anna's photo shoot the other day. And they're super gorgeous. Here's a peek...

Aww my little chubba looks so fat :)

Some of them are slightly blurry but that's only because I haven't changed the pixel size yet.

We've got another photo shoot lined up in a few weeks too! I so should have put up this post as if they were my own shots, but I can't take credit for them. I wish!

Today is a new day.

I want to put up a new post, something a little less dull and depressing than my last. Things still aren't quite great, I wouldn't even stretch as far as good, but they're looking up.

So here are some photos of Anna from the past few weeks, or months. Despite the crappiness in all its glory that we've experienced over the past few weeks, Anna and I have had some lovely times together. And on a day like this, no one can make me laugh quite as much as she does.

 First thing in the morning.

 12th August - My Birthday.

Anna's usual posse.

She absolutely loved her first bubble bath.

 Just hanging out with mum.

 Helping mum with the business.

 And her diary...

I know it's out of focus, but it's really cute.

You see, Anna is generally a very happy baby.

 She laughs a lot.

And loves chocolate.

And money.

We do really have a lot of fun.

I really love my little girl. She's like a ray of sunshine, especially after we've all had a good night's sleep. When I stop and tell myself to 'stop' and enjoy the moment, Anna really makes me smile. Oh, if only we could all squish our hands and feet in paint like nothing else matters. I'm just glad that finger paint and bubbles are the most important and exciting things for Anna in her life; I'm glad she doesn't see the crappiness.

I love you.